I’m having a really hard day. I was scheduled to have a psychiatrist appointment this afternoon. But they called me early in the morning to tell me she was ill and couldn’t see me until next month. I was all discombobulated waking up early. But at least I had enough wherewithal to not accept the sooner appointment with the bad nurse practitioner there.
So I was woken up early, and I started thinking about my coming off of the prolixin. I was looking forward to stepping down on that today to a lower dose, but now that may be put off for a whole other month. So I couldn’t fall back asleep, but I also couldn’t wake up. I also can’t stop researching if I can cut prolixin pills in half, to continue my step down on the drug.
A few hours later and I was still awake but super out of it. I normally sleep late and need to in order to get enough sleep for me, but I just couldn’t do it.
Then Brad needed to go out and I wasn’t up for going out with him. So he left. I woke up for real after that, but am now freaking out. I don’t know what to do about going down on my med. My psychiatrist hasn’t called in my med refills yet, so I’m not sure we’ll have them before we leave for DC. I can’t figure out what to do about showering today. Brad says I also need to take out the trash and recycling, but I am having a hard time even opening the door to let the dogs out to potty!
Plus I have rally class tonight, and Brad can’t come with me. I’m not sure I’m safe to drive! But I paid for the class and I want to go. Then again, how am I going to go to rally class if I can’t even leave my house to go into the back yard.
I’m thirsty, and I can’t even seem to follow the simple process to make myself some iced tea. It’s bad.
Hestia and Ollie are helping me stay calm enough to be safe, but just barely. I am so confused and anxious, and worried, and tired but oddly awake. I texted Brad, with no response. I am sure he is fine, but my stupid head keeps telling me bad things are happening to him.
Ack! Freaking out here! Good thoughts appreciated.