Monthly Archives: December 2018


Where is my mind 2

How I’m feeling right now in music. The Pixies “Where is my mind”. Youtube video with lyrics: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ut52Szpd-w I don’t really understand the lyrics, but that goes with how I’m feeling.


Out of it 1

Yesterday I went swimming with CJ, and then we hung out with Dan. CJ told me I was acting a bit out of it– maybe my brain wasn’t working great, or maybe I wasn’t keeping up the happy facade that I try to so carefully cultivate. I still had a […]


More bitey face!

Visit from an old friend and new dog 1

Brad has known his best friend Rohit since high school. Together they founded a philosophy and religious studies club for their high school, and Brad went on to study philosophy, while Rohit went on to study religion. Rohit is a professor in Tennessee now. Yesterday Rohit came to spend the […]


Medication frustration 7

I started Latuda a little over a month ago.  Pretty much from the first day it worked.  I have been very stable this past month!  I think I’ve only been suicidal once!  And my anxiety is down, too.  Latuda is one of the three medications approved to treat Bipolar depression. […]


Medical practice makes perfect? 1

Today I thought I had an appointment with my psychiatrist.  Sometimes I am scheduled with one of his nurse practitioners, which confuses me but is okay.  Today a person I had never seen before called me back from the waiting room. She didn’t introduce herself, but when I got home […]


A selfie of me, Dan and CJ. Dan and CJ have beards and DJ is wearing a hat. I am out of focus and have hair in my face LOL! That's the kind of picture you get without a Brad there to make everything look good!

Intense discussion and friendship 1

Today I went swimming with CJ, and then out to lunch and hangout time with CJ and Dan.  I was not really in the mood to swim, but I know it is healthy for me.  When I showed up at CJ’s house, he didn’t feel like swimming either.  But CJ […]


The worst episode in my life 5

TRIGGER WARNING!  Suicide, pregnancy, cold turkeying meds, etc.  Don’t read this post if you are in a bad place! The worse episode in my life happened when I lived in Lompoc, CA, in our loft apartment.  It was about 5 or 6 years ago.  I had reason to believe I […]